GIGGLE TIME—THE FUTURE OF CHURCH

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PASTOR: “Praise the Lord!” 

CONGREGATION: Hallelujah!”

 
PASTOR: “Will everyone please turn on their tablet, PC, iPad, smart phone, and Kindle Bibles to 1 Corinthians, 13:13.   And please switch on your Bluetooth to download the sermon.”
P-a-u-s-e……

“Now, Let us pray committing this week into God’s hands.

Open your Apps, BBM, Twitter and  Facebook   , and chat with God”
S-  i  -l-e-n-c-e

“As we take our Sunday tithes and offerings, please have your credit and debit cards ready.”

“You can log on to the church Wi-Fi using the password ‘Lord909887.’

The ushers will circulate mobile card swipe machines among the worshipers:
1.     Those who prefer to make electronic fund transfers are directed to computers and laptops at the rear of the church.
2.       Those who prefer to use  iPads  can open them.  
3. Those who prefer telephone banking, take out your cell phones to transfer your contributions to the church account.
(The holy atmosphere of the Church becomes truly electrified as ALL the smart phones,  iPads  , PCs and laptops beep and flicker!)
Final Blessing and Closing Announcements.
 A.       This week’s ministry cell meetings will be held on the various  Facebook  group pages where the usual group chatting takes place.  Please log in and don’t miss out.
  
B. Thursday’s Bible study will be held live on Skype at 1900 hrs GMT. Please don’t miss out.
                                                                               
C. You can follow your Pastor on Twitter this weekend for  counselling  and prayers.
 
God bless and have a nice day.
And Jesus wept

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Comments (30)

  1. Munkyman

    It’s the present in some cases.
    http://onlinechurch.com/
    just one of 432,000,000 hits when Google searched “online church.”

    August 22, 2015
  2. SEC

    Yup a good case for repeating the shortest verse

    August 22, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      Hehehehehehehehe….

      August 22, 2015
    2. briton

      During a televised event in Britain there was some sort of power outage.An eminent B.B.C, commentator said Jesus wept!He didn’t know that his microphone was unaffected.

      August 22, 2015
      1. SEC

        The “open mike” ooopsies are just grand aren’t they

        August 22, 2015
      2. dreamshadow59

        Hehehehehe…

        August 22, 2015
  3. nikolasperson

    We are all mortals, the “paying” time is not far, for nobody, the last giggle, is left for God.

    August 22, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      Amen!!!

      August 22, 2015
    2. briton

      Agreed

      August 22, 2015
      1. briton

        God’s a comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh.

        August 23, 2015
        1. dreamshadow59

          Amen brother…Amen…

          August 23, 2015
  4. briton

    During the sermon an elderly lady whispered to her husband
    I just let a silent fart.What should we do? He replied
    Put a new battery in your hearing aid.

    August 22, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      Hehehehehehe….

      August 22, 2015
    2. Hugh_Pizmehoff

      lmao

      August 22, 2015
      1. dreamshadow59

        I know, right???

        August 22, 2015
  5. Hugh_Pizmehoff

    [ puts a couple Bit Coins in the collection ]

    August 22, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      Hehehehehe!!!!!!

      August 22, 2015
      1. briton

        When I was sittin’ there in church collection plate came round
        And me not bein’ a greedy bugger I only took half a crown
        This oul’ bugger next to me started to lecture me
        Says I shut up you silly oul’ bugger,there’s plenty left for thee

        December 19, 2015
  6. bythesea

    Upon death you will be either uploaded or downloaded

    August 23, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      August 23, 2015
  7. malaine114

    Ohhh I Love that

    August 23, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      I really enjoyed it also…..

      August 23, 2015
  8. wirelessguru1

    Well, they can always come here and chat with Me…

    August 23, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      Shall I beckon them for you????

      August 23, 2015
      1. wirelessguru1

        Well, too bad for them if they still did not figure out that I AM here.

        August 23, 2015
        1. dreamshadow59

          Yes Millord…….

          August 23, 2015
  9. sunshineandraindrops

    There’s an App for that… This is excellent. I shall recommend it to my church pastor at once.

    August 23, 2015
    1. dreamshadow59

      Hehehehehehe…..OK!!!!

      August 23, 2015
  10. briton

    Got a stick deodorant.The instructions said remove cap and push up bottom.
    I can hardly walk but when I fart the room smells lovely.

    May 10, 2016
    1. dreamshadow59

      Hehehehehehehehehehe……

      May 10, 2016